My Tobey is gone and I just miss him terribly. I really do not think that anyone quite understands just how much I am attached to that kid. It is not something that I did on purpose. It just happened. Years and years of doctors appointments, hospitalizations, clinic appointments, and tests helped us grow quite a bond. Since I was the only one who took him to all of these things, it just grew stronger and stronger. When you hold someone's hand through so many experiences, there is just something there. It cannot be avoided. I have been told by others that I need to help him become more independent and less needy as far as what I do for him. I have worked very hard recently to try and nudge him along the road of independence. I guess that I never realized how hard it would be for me....
He is up at a brand new camp 5 hours from home. I am sure that he is meeting new friends and having loads of fun. However, I still miss him terribly and cannot wait till he returns. Just a small glimpse for me of what life will be like when he heads off to college. I will miss him (all 3 of them) so!
When they place that tiny special needs baby in your arms, they never tell you just how attached you will get....
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5 comments:
{{{Jenn}}} Your feelings are so normal and I know it has got to be heartbreaking not to have Tobey around. :o(
This camp is so good for Tobey and I'm sure he's really enjoying being with his friends, but I'm sure he mises you too.
I know I'll be sad in a couple weeks when I won't be able to see Hannah for 36 hours.
Jenn, you're a wonderful loving momma with a big heart!!!
I read that first line and about had a heart attack until I read further. Okay, now that my heart rate has come down, I'm sending you big hugs. It's hard to stand back and let go sometimes, even when you know you are doing the righ thing. I hope he is having a terrific time at camp, and I hope the time flies by quickly until he is home.
Thank God! When I read that first sentence, I about had a heart attack!
From what I saw, Tobey is VERY independent and not needy at all! I'm sure you miss him. Hopefully the trips will go to a college nearby.
Good to see you back again, Jenn.
And yes, I totally understand...in all the juggling I do and my desire for a few moments to myself, I find those few moments painfully empty without my Jakie and Autumn!
I was ok...knew that he went to camp every summer, but for others you could have caused a mass exodus to every ER in town...Jenn- you rock as a mom. I want you to know that. When I am so tired somedays, I think of you, step back and tell myself to shut up and get over it! You have done an incredible job with all of your children, especially Tobey. When he is grown, he will look back on a childhood that, although filled with medical issues, was full of love and happiness from a great mother! They grow up so quickly. Hold on while you can before they break free. Why not enjoy every moment now? They will stretch their wings of independence before we know it.
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